Dilemmas of the day
What do you do when one of your children takes an interest in the one thing in the whole world you don't want him to?
VIDEO GAMES! Yes, I am one of "those" mom's who believe that video games and TV could be the root of all evil. Maybe that is a little extreme, but for real I'm just not a fan of my kid zoning out for hours at a time punching, kicking, and killing other characters, or getting so involved in a dumb cartoon that he has no idea the house is on fire. Unfortunately we don't get to pick what are children enjoy. How do I tell a little boy who does great in school, and is good (overall) he can't play any video games? He is obsessed with his Gameboy, which we made him wait almost 3 years to get. He asked for one when he was 4, so we bought a Leapster and told him he was not old enough for a Gameboy. This year for Christmas he finally received a Gameboy. I did not want to buy it, but it was what he wanted, what do you do with that? When I told him he might not get a Gameboy for Christmas because he was not 7 yet (which was the magic age we told him he had to be to get a Gameboy), he said "Mom I have to tell you something. When you weren't looking I asked Santa for a Gameboy. What if he brings one?" ???????? What is a mom suppose to do with that?
So here I am loathing the one thing my child loves more than anything else in the world. He takes a Tae Kwon Do class, and does very well in school. He loves to play at the park and will go bike riding if we go with him, BUT all he really wants to do is play the Gameboy, and I hate that! I monitor it, set time limits, and take it away if he does anything wrong, but I can't make him not like it. Which leads me to my next parenting dilemma......
How do I raise two TOTALLY different boys and get the same outcome? The desire outcome would be "a college educated, strong, respectful, happy and productive member of society, who loves his mom."
My middle child (5) is a very active little boy. He would spend all day outside, he thinks Gameboy is "boring", and rarely sits through a whole movie. He is fearless, and rambunctious, constantly has a wise-ass comment for things, and always acts "cool" somewhat like Fonzie from Happy Days.
My oldest on the other hand is much calmer. He would like to watch TV or play video games all day, he draws (very well), and reads comic books. 
I strive to nurture both of their strengths and weaknesses, but how? I want to scream at them "Stop playing stupid video games they will rot your brain out!" and "Get off that skate board you're gonna break your leg!". How do I act proud of a child that just beat "Darth Vader" in his newest video game? How do I let the other one out the front door when I know he is likely to break or hurt something on the very same body that I gave birth to a few short years ago? When I finally get this supportive but not over-bearing mom thing down I will then have to teach them how to respect eachother's differences. AAAAHHHHHH! They are only 5 and 7, and I have a little girl to deal with after that. Wish me luck!
posted by all that's right, or not @ 4/18/2006
3 Comments
3 Comments:
I'm right there with you - it makes me crazy to see a kid in front of a video game. Actually, it makes me nuts to see grown-ups do it too. But yeah, Isaac likes his computer a little too much so we seriously restrict his time in front of it. He can only play one hour at a time three times a week. Oh god, my kids are going to hate me when they're teens.
Okay, so I am one of those moms who caved into video games. But the oldest who is great at the games got a 690 in reading, 650 in math and 630 on his writing SATS, he's politically aware of the world, an incredible reader and got into 5/8 colleges he applied to. I do wish I had limited it a bit, but he is the least athletic out of the three and is doing fine. They go in spurts with their game playing, so it isn't every day and I only see the game boys on long car rides.
There should be limits and if we don't make them, they will never learn how to set them themselves. I have a friend who would only allow 1hour of screen time a day and that included video, tv and computer. Both of her boys are incredibly active and bright, so it worked for them.
One time we test drove a used minivan that had a nintendo in it and just for the short time, we swore we would never allow one of them installed in our car! Imagine that scenario with your kids!
Hang in there.
Definitely limit his time on video games, but let him have fun. I grew playing video games. It started out with the Atari to Nintendo to Nintendo 64. I now own Gameboy Advance, Gamecube, Playstation, and XBox. I know, I'm too old for this shit, but it's fun. Like anything, as long as it doesn't consume his every action then it's fine.
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